I have a fear. It is of dying. And not by getting old.
It is by something awful....like hit by a bus or dying by botulism.
And I can't just think I might die. I have to play out the whole frigging scene in my head!!!
Last night I made spaghetti sauce. Home made with home canned tomatoes from our garden.
"Don't use those." said the husband. "They might have botulism and we could die!!!"
Of course I told him they do not have it. There are no mold spots, acid spots in the lid, or broken seals. We will be fine.
Mind you that I have NO real idea what botulism is. So I come to work this morning and get online. I find out that it is a SERIOUSLY nasty thing. It causes you to loose TOTAL muscle control. So basically you drool, pee yourself, have no reflexes and then YOU DIE.
I read this and the 1st symptom is to feel light headed. So of course I start to get light headed. Down right dizzy. I had to tell myself to KNOCK IT OFF before I collapsed on the floor drooling.
Why do I do that? It is like when I come home from work. I drive on the top of the bridge. I can see myself going over EVERY DAY. When will my brain shut down?????
Oh and it takes 18 to 36 hours for the botulism to show up. So if I don't write again...I'm DEAD.
Have a nice day.